Dialog meme: Shinon edition
Dec. 24th, 2014 05:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shinonCouple of short fics for a meme going around Tumblr wherein someone picks a line of dialog from a list, and some characters, and then stuff happens.
1. Shinon and "Are you drunk?"
"Rolf," came a hoarse whisper from outside the gate. "Hey, Rolf, open up."
"Who goes there?" said Rolf, out of a vague conviction that this was what you were supposed to say. He hadn’t been put on watch very often; Oscar said he was too young, and took on extra watches himself. Even Boyd did sometimes.
"Seriously? Who else could it be?"
"Uncle Shinon?"
"Damn right. You letting me in or what?"
"Ike said -"
"Ike said this, Ike said that. Ike should - Ike should be a fuckin’ nursemaid if he’s gonna go around trying to tell people when to go to bed -"
"Uncle Shinon," said Rolf, reprovingly, "are you drunk?"
"Noooo, not me, I was just out here for a refreshing breath of night air." He gave a scornful chuckle. "Course I am. Gatrie make it back all right?"
"I haven’t seen him."
"Damn. Well. He’ll turn up. C’mon, open the gate."
Rolf opened the gate. “We’re marching out tomorrow, you know,” he said, and watched his mentor stumble in, and wondered whether he’d be in any state to march anywhere in the morning.
Shinon flapped a hand at him dismissively. “‘M not gonna miss it. I never miss anything.” He chuckled again, swaying on the spot. “Get it? ‘Cause -“
Rolf blurted out, “I heard Titania say she’s worried you’re a bad influence.”
"Bah." Shinon reached over, after an odd deliberate pause, and mussed Rolf’s hair. "I’ll show you a bad influence.” As he made his way further into the fortress, he called sarcastically over his shoulder, “Fix your hair, kid, you’re gonna make Ike look bad.”
2. Shinon and Gatrie and "You don't need to protect me"
"I don’t think so," said Shinon, and put a foot out into the road. The merchant tripped and went sprawling. Shinon leaned back against the wall of the neighboring shop and let him get up.
"What was that for?"
"What did you just sell that guy?"
The merchant dusted himself off and glowered at Shinon. “A protective amulet, if you must know. Guaranteed to stop arrows, magic spells, other projectiles - ow!” The man broke off and rubbed at his forehead. No surprise there - Shinon had just flicked a small rock at him.
"You carrying one of those amulets right now?"
"A few -"
"Thought so." Shinon grabbed him by the arm and dragged him back out to the main street. "Hey, Gatrie!" he shouted down the road. "You’re gonna want a refund. Again."
Gatrie had already moved on to the next stall, but looked back at this. “What, really? I thought for sure this was going to work.”
"Nope, another fake. Look, the dye’s already coming off on your hands." Shinon shoved the merchant toward him. "Well? Give him his money back."
After the exchange had been made, and the amulet seller had left in disgrace, Shinon said, “The hell do you need one of those for anyway? You’ve got all that armor -“
"I was gonna give it to you."
"Oh." He didn’t immediately know what to make of that. He settled on, "Well, that’s stupid."
"You didn’t have to go after that guy. I’ve got enough money saved up that I can take a hit sometimes -"
"No you don’t."
"But you don’t need to protect me."
"Nope. And you don’t need to buy me dinner." Shinon elbowed him in the ribs. "But you’re gonna."
1. Shinon and "Are you drunk?"
"Rolf," came a hoarse whisper from outside the gate. "Hey, Rolf, open up."
"Who goes there?" said Rolf, out of a vague conviction that this was what you were supposed to say. He hadn’t been put on watch very often; Oscar said he was too young, and took on extra watches himself. Even Boyd did sometimes.
"Seriously? Who else could it be?"
"Uncle Shinon?"
"Damn right. You letting me in or what?"
"Ike said -"
"Ike said this, Ike said that. Ike should - Ike should be a fuckin’ nursemaid if he’s gonna go around trying to tell people when to go to bed -"
"Uncle Shinon," said Rolf, reprovingly, "are you drunk?"
"Noooo, not me, I was just out here for a refreshing breath of night air." He gave a scornful chuckle. "Course I am. Gatrie make it back all right?"
"I haven’t seen him."
"Damn. Well. He’ll turn up. C’mon, open the gate."
Rolf opened the gate. “We’re marching out tomorrow, you know,” he said, and watched his mentor stumble in, and wondered whether he’d be in any state to march anywhere in the morning.
Shinon flapped a hand at him dismissively. “‘M not gonna miss it. I never miss anything.” He chuckled again, swaying on the spot. “Get it? ‘Cause -“
Rolf blurted out, “I heard Titania say she’s worried you’re a bad influence.”
"Bah." Shinon reached over, after an odd deliberate pause, and mussed Rolf’s hair. "I’ll show you a bad influence.” As he made his way further into the fortress, he called sarcastically over his shoulder, “Fix your hair, kid, you’re gonna make Ike look bad.”
2. Shinon and Gatrie and "You don't need to protect me"
"I don’t think so," said Shinon, and put a foot out into the road. The merchant tripped and went sprawling. Shinon leaned back against the wall of the neighboring shop and let him get up.
"What was that for?"
"What did you just sell that guy?"
The merchant dusted himself off and glowered at Shinon. “A protective amulet, if you must know. Guaranteed to stop arrows, magic spells, other projectiles - ow!” The man broke off and rubbed at his forehead. No surprise there - Shinon had just flicked a small rock at him.
"You carrying one of those amulets right now?"
"A few -"
"Thought so." Shinon grabbed him by the arm and dragged him back out to the main street. "Hey, Gatrie!" he shouted down the road. "You’re gonna want a refund. Again."
Gatrie had already moved on to the next stall, but looked back at this. “What, really? I thought for sure this was going to work.”
"Nope, another fake. Look, the dye’s already coming off on your hands." Shinon shoved the merchant toward him. "Well? Give him his money back."
After the exchange had been made, and the amulet seller had left in disgrace, Shinon said, “The hell do you need one of those for anyway? You’ve got all that armor -“
"I was gonna give it to you."
"Oh." He didn’t immediately know what to make of that. He settled on, "Well, that’s stupid."
"You didn’t have to go after that guy. I’ve got enough money saved up that I can take a hit sometimes -"
"No you don’t."
"But you don’t need to protect me."
"Nope. And you don’t need to buy me dinner." Shinon elbowed him in the ribs. "But you’re gonna."
